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Shooting Star 34: This Is Not My Idea Of A Good Time

Feb. 11th, 2009 | 02:28 pm
location: "Home"
mood: frustrated frustrated
music: Garbage - Not My Idea

Well, I feel as though I'm in a rut for all intents and purposes. I just feel that, with so many things pulling me in so many directions and the prospect of so many good things happening soon, why do I feel as though I'm standing still watching all of it happening? I feel as though I'm standing outside of myself, on the sidelines, watching this happen, and seeing the shell of myself standing there, screaming at it to do something. Then there's the fear in me that things are going to progressively go downhill, most specifically with my health. Two Thursdays ago, I had a seizure just outside of the shower, and I still haven't fully recovered. I was getting soap from under the bathroom sink because we were out, and when I was going back into the shower, I slipped on the floor and collided first with the toilet (to which I still bear a bruise and a small scar), and then slammed into the bathtub before I lost consciousness and seized. When I woke up, the back of my head was sore and spongy, my left side was numb, and my speech was slurred. I was disoriented, and the first thing I did was call Adam to take me to the hospital, and then Aaron who picked me up later. Wrapping this part up, we went to UMC's ED which I left after 4 hours and went to St. Joe's where they did a head and neck CT, and told me to follow up with my neurologist. The following Monday, he upped my seizure meds by 500mg, re-ordered the MRI, and I follow up with him in March.

However, after talking with my Mom, and the nurses at work, it's still blurred whether or not I had a grand mal seizure or had a small stroke, because I still have lingering weakness and numbness on my left side. I'll hopefully know more tomorrow or next week after I have my MRI. Aside from that though, drag's bringing me down, work's bringing me down, my inadvertant isolation is bringing me down, and even when this should be joyous, the advent of three friends coming back is bringing me down. With regard to drag, we have a show coming up at the end of the month that we're still not completely prepared for, with another show less than a month later that we need to prepare for. There has been some drama, especially with the year ahead that we have in front of us, with how many people are still invested, motivated, and interested in the troupe. Aside from that, I'm tired of being treated like a china doll because of my seizure disorder. So, I'm trying to stay positive through that even though I'm getting frustrated.

Work's bringing me down because I know that with having to take days off here and there because of the seizures, and the fact that I'm already walking a thin line with regard to the attendance policy and being already on a final warning, it's only a matter of time before they try to have me fired. The only things that seem to be working in my favor is that I have an excellent professional relationship with my nurses who apparently (and I'm saying this without ego) have good things to say about me, and the fact that I'm apparently back in my immediate supervisor's good graces. I'm still debating about getting my CNA as a recourse in March, because self-preservation and my instinct to have a contingency plan are getting the better of me.

The fact that I can't drive, and have to rely on either Skylar or local transit systems' antiquated schedule in order to get around, has really got me down. I really miss the freedom that being able to drive my car afforded me, and even after not being able to drive for almost 3 months, it's still a hell of an adjustment. Last night, I went to drag practice and was thoroughly annoyed with having to call Skylar in order to get home. I hate having to rely on people once again to be my transport when I have a car and am able to drive even though legally and medically I'm strictly forbidden. I can't even ride a freaking bike to get around because of the chance that I might seize when riding it, and then getting hit by traffic, which makes sense, but all the same it's frustrating as all hell.

Now, with the three friends coming back, there are a few things about that. One of them who is coming back said that they'd never do it, and from what I can gather seems less than thrilled about said return, and though I've tried to convey joyous feelings about the return and helping to get this person re-acclimated, it seems as though my help and whatnot aren't needed and/or wanted. It irritates me, because this person was a huge help to me in the past, and though I've somewhat repaid the debt I feel that this person is owed, I never feel as though I completely will because they were there for me when no one else was, and to be more or less denied the opportunity to repay my karmic debt (and in a sense to assuage my own conscience), hurts. What hurts even more is that this person seems to be utilizing a mutual friend in our lives as the coordinator for their return, even though this person is someone who, on multiple occasions, my friend has expressed their distrust of. I mean, if I've suddenly lost favor with you (or anyone for that matter), man/woman up and freaking tell me instead of expecting me to be some sort of mind reader! Your return means the world to me and others, and even though this is probably the last place that you would want to be, it means the world to me that you're returning and can once again be a part of my life!

Then, another person who is for all intents and purposes, my shining star, will be returning to me soon. The time table isn't definite, but all the same, the anticipation is so strong it's almost tangible. I can't say how much I've longed for this person to come back to me, because since they've left, there has been a void in my life that seems as though it hasn't been truly filled. Even thinking about it right now, has got tears in my eyes, because I miss this person so much. The third, should hopefully be here by the end of April, and even though I haven't heard from this person since around Christmas, I'm hoping that everything is still in line for their return. I know that I should be happy about this, but I just feel really sad about it. I mean, I have really good friends here that I click with, but we all just seem so spread apart (and I will admit my own fault in that), but what are you supposed to do when you seem to be reaching out, but with the few exceptions here and there, your hand constantly gets slapped away? It fucking hurts, and it hurts even more when you realize that there was a strong connection and friendship there that seems to be progressively dwindling away.

That's why I'm glad that when my three (or rather two of them I suppose) return, that maybe it'll help me get out of my funk.

Shooting Star 33: F*ck to the 13th Power!

Jan. 23rd, 2009 | 08:49 pm
location: "Home"
mood: pissed off pissed off
music: Deftones - 7 Words

I want to throw my computer against a fucking wall right now, I am so over this goddamned thing right now. I had a problem with the thing in the latter part of '06 with the A/C adapter cord not charging the main battery. I got that shit replaced, but in the last month and a half, I've had problems with my USB ports not recognizing my USB devices and claiming that they're malfunctioning, yet said devices work on other computers. What's really pissing me off is that I recently backed up my important shit after the damned thing was running slower than molasses, and when I reformatted and installed some kick ass anti-everything software, it still didn't solve the problem with my USB ports, at least not all the way. Up until earlier this evening, one (yes just ONE) of my USB ports worked, and would recognize my external hard drive, and now none of them will, and I only have three ports (though the computer itself claims that I have 6). I'm now faced with a dilemma: do I keep a computer that works fine for all intents and purposes aside from the USB ports, do I venture down the path of long and tedious (not to mention potentially expensive) repair, or do I just save up to buy another piece of shit that will just become a paperweight in a year?

I'm wanting to call Mike Pollack or my friend Eric, but I'm not sure how much this will cost me, and even though I now have a bit of "buffer" income as it were, I'm still not wanting to fork over what would equate to one arm, one leg, and a portion of my non-existant first born child in order to fix this. *sigh* I have no idea what to do.

Shooting Star 32: Freedom Was Just Another Word For Nothing Left To Loose.

Jan. 23rd, 2009 | 04:02 pm
location: "Home"
mood: calm calm
music: Jennifer Love Hewitt - Me And Bobby McGee

So the last 4 days have been absolutely glorious, not a care in the world. After working a 60+ hour week, having 5 days to do nothing but sit on your ass and relax is truly a wonderful thing. The only real exciting things that I did this week were go to practice last night (though it ended early and the time was spent totally unproductively), and I made Amish Friendship Bread on Wednesday night; it was wonderful, a white chocolate cranberry loaf. That's about it, I have a busy week ahead of me next week, and I have decided that come hell or high water, I am going to get my hurr did, because I can't do anything with it any more and the massive curls are getting difficult to manage. Well, although brief, that's what's going on in my small corner of the universe.

Shooting Star 31: It's Been So Long Since You've Been A Friend Of Mine.

Jan. 16th, 2009 | 10:11 am
location: "Home"
mood: depressed depressed
music: Liz Phair - Friend Of Mine

So let me start this out by saying that I have become a trend whore, and am now addicted to Facebook. I've had one for a little while, but didn't really care about it that much aside from keeping in touch with a few friends who have strayed from Myspace and whatnot, but in the say, past few days since I found out that my Rangerboard peeps are all on there and we have all since added each other, I'm on it constantly. Since I've been on this networking kick, I thought that I'd look up some old friends, specifically some from Marana. I found a few of my oldish friends, and then I found Clint and Drew, two people who, aside from Desra and Mandy, will stick out to me in particular.

Clint was my best friend in Marana from the age of 8 to roughly 14-ish. He was my confidant, best friend, partner in crime, hell we ever had aspirations of being college roommates. Things turned sour in the last year of junior high when I started hanging out with the goths more, and he started to hang out with the burgeoning popular kids. We still talked and hung out and spent the night at each others' houses, but the "link" as it were was disappearing. When I moved in with my Mom and started high school in the city, we still kept in touch, but the real end to our friendship came when I sought his help with the whole business with Sean. Fast forward about 5 1/2 years, and he and I talked a few times on AIM, but nothing really came of it other than "Hey, you're alive!".

I just really lament the fact that, if things were different, he would be my oldest friend aside from Stephanie, and would really know who I am, know my heart, and my history. I often feel sometimes that aside from my family, there really is nothing that links me to my past aside from my own, sometimes distorted memories. Sure there are somethings, if not most things that are better left forgotten, but at the same time, there were good times spent with friends, and I sometimes feel that other than my memories, there's nothing really tangible to say that I was even there. No marks, nothing that is left behind at all; as if I was just a passing thought.

Then there's Drew, where to start with Drew. Drew was, for all intents and purposes, my first real crush, and damn if he wasn't fine as hell. Very dapper, well dressed, popular, but really had no inclination of what he wanted romantically. He and I talked somewhat in the classes he and I had (particularly Civics), and I'd help him out with assignments and whatnot, but we weren't ever really "friends", just more like strong acquaintances if anything. I remember that I would stare at him in Civics, and just daydream, and that's the first sign that I knew I liked guys. I think that he knew, because he caught me sometimes staring at him, and coming out of daydreams. I know that he's straight now, and I think that had he and I continued to stay friends, we'd be cool even with me being who I am today, but I just wonder what could've been y'know?

I wish that things hadn't gone down the way they did, and that I didn't have to literally turn my back on everything that I knew and the life that I had built. In retrospect, the loss of those friendships and others aside, I don't regret where life has taken me. I wouldn't have met the people that are in my life right now, I wouldn't have had some of the experiences that I've had that have taken me to where I am now, I wouldn't be the person that I am now, and I know that that all goes without saying. I just sometimes get lonely though, because I feel like sometimes, even the Scoobs don't really get me, and that the only person who comes close other than Skylar for obvious reasons, is Bess, and she's not only on the other side of the country at the moment, but I haven't seen her in over 5 years. I don't know, maybe I'm just longing for a friend to talk about the good times with, to reflect with, and I don't have that right now, and it's a very lonely feeling.

Shooting Star 30: Do Anything To Change Your Mind

Jan. 15th, 2009 | 02:45 pm
location: "Home"
mood: tired tired
music: Girls Aloud - The Loving Kind

So I just got off of a 62 1/2 hour work week, and damn am I tired. I am so over the unit at work right now, and am so thankful for my 2 days off before I go back for 2 more. All in all, it was a good week, horribly drama filled and profitable, but nonetheless drama filled. Two of my nurses were written up for shirking one of their somewhat major responsibilities, and one of them has gone on the offensive, noting other people's mishaps to make herself look better in the eyes of the big boss, and she's pissing everyone the fuck off. She went off on this rant because we had this patient who wasn't medically appropriate at all for the unit, he was in renal & liver failure and in congestive heart failure and had C Diff to boot, and was incontinent of bladder and stool and would constantly shit himself. He was unwilling to get his crotchety self in the shower, so we were constantly bedbathing him, changing his linens, and cleaning shit off of him.

So this nurse, Brandon (yeah I know, she has a boy's name), goes off on Tuesday morning, saying how we all deserve a hit for being negligent with his care, and we all basically just ignore her. So the next morning, after talking about it with my nurse Maggie and deciding that she's trying to make herself look good (since she was a ICU nurse and knows and has seen everything -_-;), Julissa, Maggie, and I all talked to Georgette and basically told her that Brandon was full of shit, and I think Georgette got the message. She's even targeting our Activities Specialist, by saying that she's not doing her job properly. Suzanne, the aforementioned activities specialist, is recovering from a freaking stroke! Grated it happened over 2 months ago, but still, stroke recovery takes a long while, and seriously, how fucked up is that to target someone with somewhat of a disability? She's got some memory problems, it's improved her attitude, but all in all, Suzanne hasn't changed that much, but it's still fucked up. I work with the bitch this weekend, and let me tell you, I'm not only going to stay out of her way as to not give her any ammunition, but I'm also going to be watching her like a hawk. Aside from that, the other work drama was that one of the other techs might get fired, thus bumping me up officially to full time status.

We had some pain in the ass patients, some of which my nurses and I had to resist all urge to bitchslap at times, but thankfully they're all gone. I don't know, sleep depravity causes a great deal of apathy, so I'm pretty much there. That's about it.

Shooting Star 29: 2008 - Go On And Take A Bow

Jan. 8th, 2009 | 06:04 am
location: "Home"
mood: blah blah
music: Rhianna - Take A Bow

I wish there was a real reason as to why I haven't updated this thing in close to six and a half months, but other than sheer apathy, and lack of anything really update worthy, that's about it. However, given that it's a new year, it's time for a new soul, and a way to quickly wrap-up the last year/last 6 months.

1. My LiveJournal
Has for the most part been non-existant. It's just that, I feel like my life doesn't really have anything worth updating on as of late, and I really don't have that drive to constantly update that I once did like, back in '03. Not to say that I feel as though I've become a boring old queen or something to that effect ^_~*.

2. My Friends
Well, given my schedule, health, inability to drive, lack of fundage at times, and my becoming more and more of a homebody, outings with friends have become few and far between. That, and the fact that all of The Scoobs seem to be doing our own things (Aaron making the "Outers" a more prominent presence in his life, Gloria being inundated with dating Blair and doing the BDSM thing, Adam and Matt doing their own things, Ruben still in Phoenix, and Dorian being until recently out of the country), we rarely have time for each other nowadays, and it seems lately that we only really see each other with special appointment. That, and behaviors and things have been said all the way around that have, at times, seemed to strain our friendships with each other. I hope that 2009 sees a "mending of fences" as it were, because I really do miss my friends, and I miss the presence that they have/had in my life.

3. My Memories
Since the debacle that was '06, I feel that the last 2-3 years have been about me, more or less rebuilding my life and in a sense taking my destiny into my own hands. I've become much more proactive about my career path and what I want to do with the rest of my life by making calculated career moves. It may seem at times that I'm moving at a snail's pace, but I'm doing what I need to do. I've also seen myself become open to a healthy, loving, monogamous relationship, and I have every confidence (especially as of late) that I am going to spend the rest of my life with this man that I've had the pleasure of being in love with for just shy of two years. Since the odd numbered years seem to be years that are better for me, and 9 being one of my lucky numbers, I have a lot of confidence in 2009 being a good year for me.

4. My Family
Not a whole lot has changed as far as that's concerned. I feel that the trip to Le Miss, that things have become a lot less intense and there is much more understanding as far as the family and I are concerned. I think that it mainly stems from the fact that they no longer see me as a child, and that I finally came out to them as a whole. Other than that, same old same old with them. I do feel that, especially in the last year, my extended family (as in my soon to be in-laws) and I have become somewhat closer. I'm thankful everyday for Pam, because I know that it couldn't have been easy for her to not only accept that her only son is gay, but to accept what comes with it (namely me). Sure at times I've felt extremely uncomfortable, but Pam, and I think Marisa as well (not sure about O.T, still can't read him) have accepted me and taken a liking to me, and the feeling is mutual.

5. My Personal Matters
Well, as I've said, the friends and Skylar issues are going well. The only other thing being my health, and the seizure meds are really helping.

6. My Job
So far so good, even though I constantly feel as though I'm under a microscope and have to walk around on eggshells. I'm glad that I have good "friends" in my nurses for the most part.

7. My Acedmeic Career
Once I have my PCT certificate in my hand, I'll know more.

8. My Reasons
One word: Catharsis.


Oct. 28th, 2008 | 09:38 pm
location: "Home"
music: Inoj - Time After Time

Glomped from icyred


Sarah Palin married her high school boyfriend, Todd Palin, on August 29, 1988. The Palin family lives in Wasilla, about 45 miles (72 km) north of Anchorage. The Palins have two sons (Track, 19, and Trig, four months) and three daughters (Bristol, 17; Willow, 14; and Piper, 7) [ages as of August 2008]. Todd Palin has said Track's name came from the interest Sarah's parents had in the sport and the fact that he was born in the sport's season; Bristol was named after Bristol Bay in Alaska, where Todd grew up and where he does commercial fishing; Willow was named after Willow, Alaska; Piper got her name because it is uncommon and "a cool name"; Trig's name is Norse for "strength".

1) Your first-born will be named after your parents favorite sport:

Figure (as in figure skating).

2) Your second-born will be named after a nearby area that you're not from but you like the sound of part of the name, and maybe you have nostalgic memories of said place:


3) Your third-born will be named after another nearby place, for no reason other than you already have two children and don't have time to put much thought into another name:

Sierra (as in Sierra Vista)

4) Your fourth gets a "cool" name:


5) Your fifth gets something mythological, possibly straight out of Lord of the Rings:


PR: Starlight Tempest

Sep. 23rd, 2008 | 08:30 am
location: "Home"
mood: accomplished accomplished
music: The Faders - No Sleep Tonight

So this is a fanfic of a fanfic that I am writing. This all started on Rangerboard, and this is a sequel to Tristan's awesome work.


A fanfic of a fanfic. The continuing saga.

Power Rangers: Starlight Tempest
Written by Pinkpower

“No Sleep Tonight”

The room is dim, the faint candlelight dancing off the wall is the only thing to breach the darkness. Surrounded by countless books, a hooded figure sits for hours on end, transcribing book, after book, in complete silence.

“I‘ve brought you some dinner Brother.” says a priest, entering the room with a tray of food and drink. “We missed you at supper”.

The room remains quiet.

“I realize that you have only been with us for a short time Brother John, but you shouldn‘t isolate yourself.” said the priest, the name causing the hooded figure to stir.

“Since you do not speak, we did not know your name, but it appears that that name bothers you. We took you in here, and with your gift of transcribing our ancient texts, we gave you the name John after the patron saint of mystics. You have been a blessing to us Brother John, in aiding us in this endeavor. I‘ve never known anyone who could translate ancient Babylonian or ancient Sumerian.” The priest said, placing the tray of food near the hooded figure.

“You carry much pain, and guilt with you. I pray that God‘s mercy will help alleviate you of your burden.” The priest said, walking out of the room.

“He‘s right you know, you do carry too much guilt.”

His head snapped around. “Who‘s there!?” The room was empty, though he could have sworn he heard a voice coming from the door.

“When are you ever going to forgive yourself for what happened? My death wasn‘t your fault.”

“Shut up, you‘re not real.” the hooded figure muttered.

“I wish that you wouldn‘t keep torturing yourself like this…” the voice said, disappearing.

The hooded figure arose, tears welling in his eyes. In his self-induced solitude, he longer for that voice, as it’s presence occurred quite frequently, though he wasn’t sure if he was going mad or not. It had been so long since he had even seen the sun; keeping his head burried in the books, keeping to his act of service for the kindness the priests had shown him, was causing him distortion in his sensory perception.

“What happened to you IS my fault…” he muttered, carrying the tray of food with him. He continued toward the door until he saw something brush past his feet, blowing in the small breeze through the vents; it looked like leaves. When he reached the door, he dropped his tray in shock and fell to his knees.

“No…it‘s not real…” he said. “It‘s not real!”

He sat on the floor, tears running down his face, shaking, as he held the black rose.


“Thank you for coming out this evening. Without the support of all of you, this would never have been possible. And with that, we‘d like to bring our mistress of affairs here this evening, give it up for the one and only Miss Pinkerbell!” the announcer said. Cheers flooded the stadium, as a woman, donned in pink from head to toe, took the stage.

“Thank you so much. As you know, there is still a lot of work to be done, as the rebuilding projects continue. Just months ago, all hope seemed lost, until salvation seemed to come from out of nowhere, and hope was restored. It‘s with that hope, that we continue to raise money for this continuing effort. With the support of the tri-city coalition, our neighboring communities of Angel Grove and Stone Canyon, we know that this benefit will help to rebuild all that we‘ve lost. We would like to thank our corporate sponsors as well, especially Lightspeed Rescue, which has donated countless man hours to the rebuilding projects, but also provided urgent life saving services in the wake of the comet. We ask for your continued support, of not only money donations, but also your time, so be sure that you not only open your wallets, but your hearts as well. Remember to please see the silent auction. Alright, now for some entertainment. Get ready folks, she‘s on tour and be sure to pick up a copy of her new CD in stores now, give it up for the one and only, Kira Ford!” Pinkerbell said, to shouts coming from all directions.

Rushing off-stage to see the musical performance, she was greeted by Mack, Maf, Bradlee, Acatl, Presh, and Phillip.

“Not bad Pinky, not bad at all.” Mack said, smiling.

“Yeah, who knew an old queen could get this many people together.” Maf said, grinning, Pinky gave a smirk.

“How does all that hair not hurt you? The hairspray alone in that thing must weigh a ton!” Phillip asked, noting Pinky’s massive wig.

“Well, you know what they say, the bigger the hair, the closer to Jesus.” Pinky said, as people behind him spit out their drinks at that comment. “Well boys, I have to change for the next set. Enjoy the show, it is a party after all!”

“Who really thought that he could help pull this off?” Bradlee asked.

“Oh ye of little faith.” Acatl responded. “We‘ve all had to do our part since everything happened. Pinky uses his skills, we‘ve used ours.”

“It would be nice if everyone was here though, like the good old days.” Bradlee said.

“Nearly getting killed on a daily basis was the good old days?” Presh asked.

“If we weren‘t nearly getting killed every day, we would have never been a team. We would have never saved the world.” Bradlee answered.

“Could you keep that down? I don’t think the people at the end of the stadium heard you.” Presh said, rolling his eyes.

“It would be nice if we could do more though.” Mack said.

“Why? I mean, don‘t get me wrong, playing superhero was loads of fun and all, but we really do deserve a break.” Maf said. “The newbies can handle it.”

“The Proto Stars are a bit of a blessing.” Acatl said, referring to the four new rangers. “But are we sure they can handle things?”

“Even if they couldn‘t, I mean you know we-” Phillip was saying.

“I know, I know, but this was never their burden to carry.” Acatl said.

“They‘re rangers, it is their ’burden’ as you called it.” Presh said.

“Well, let‘s just enjoy the party, okay. Talking about the days of yore isn‘t going to bring them back.” Bradlee said, turning his attention to the concert at hand, the others following suit.


Backstage in the dressing room, Pinky was rushing to change in time for the next set. The rush of the stage crew beyond was fueling the showtime mentality and adrenaline flowing through him; it was like a drug for him doing this.

“4 minutes Miss Pinkerbell!” a stage hand knocked on the door.

“Thanks! 4 minutes to save the world…what am I gonna wear with this?” Pinky asked himself, looking into the vanity mirror trying accessorize the right jewelry with the outfit he was wearing. Another knock came to the door.

“I‘ll be right there!” Pinky yelled back. “Ah screw it, I’ll wear these.”

Walking to the dressing room door to the backstage area, Pinky was thrown back by a wave of force as he grabbed the doorknob.

“You, who was once tied to the Void, you will help us regain our strength!” a voice growled.

Pinky had hit his head hard on the wall, could barely make out the image of the shadowy figure who had entered the room. “What, what do you want!?”

“Your soul.” the voice answered. It extended it’s right hand, and crimson lightning shot out, lifting Pinky and pressing him into the wall. In the creature’s left hand, and golden dagger with a jagged blade materialized, and with every step closer to Pinky, Pinky could smell the carpet singeing. Pinky tried to fight his bonds, but the creature came to him, and slashed his arm. Pinky cried out in pain as the blood flowed out of him, the room disappearing in a haze.

From out of nowhere, a burst of light irradiated the room, and Pinky fell limp to the floor. He could barely make out a blurred figure, radiating light, as it choked the shadowed figure. In another blaze of light, the two beings vanished, and the smell of the burnt carpet flooded Pinky’s nostrils as he blacked out.


Back out in the stadium, Phillip and Acatl grabbed their heads in seering pain.

“What is it!?” Bradlee and Presh asked in unison.

“I‘m not sure…” Phillip said through gritted teeth. Bradlee tried to help Acatl to his feet, but it appeared he was having a seizure. He stood to his feet, gasped, and the color of his eyes went completely white. After a brief moment, he collapsed into Bradlee’s arms.

“Pinky…dressing room…go!” Acatl said. Presh, Mack, and Maf ran backstage, nearly bulldozing several stagehands in the process. When they arrived at Pinky’s dressing room, the outer handle was melted, and the room was scorched. In the corner, Pinky lay in a head of pink robes and matching pink feathers; his wig was singed.

“What the hell happened here?” Maf asked, taken aback. Presh and Mack helped Pinky to his feet, but he was still unconscious.

“Go get help, we‘ll stay with him.” Mack said, and Maf ran out of the room.

“What do you think happened?” Mack asked Presh.

“Not sure, but whatever it was, I don‘t have a good feeling.” Presh said, looking across the room and the scorch marks of dragged feet, with golden feathers littered near it.

The place where all the destruction had occurred had become a sort of memorial, dedicated to those who lost their lives in the wake of the comet. A park had been erected around it, to show that even in the midst of the chaos that ensued, it wouldn’t change the resolve of the people of Fair Welle City to persevere. A chunk of the comet’s crystalline exostructure was embedded into the ground, surrounded by a bronze ring, engraved with the names of those that had lost their lives in the attack.

Children played in the newly built playground just off of the memorial, their laughter echoing. Suddenly, from beneath the crystalline slab, a bright green glow emanated, and a torrent of black, tar-like substance flowed out from it. It pooled just above the crystal slab, and began to coalesce, making the figure of a man. The wind kicked up, the children continued to play, as the full form of the man was realized. He gasped, looked around, and was unable to recognize any of his surroundings.

He walked towards the city, fueled by instinct, carrying a large black sword in his hand.

To be continued…

Shooting Star 28: "They Smile In Your Face, All The Time Wanna Take Your Place. Them Backstabbers"

Aug. 22nd, 2008 | 03:04 am
location: "Home"
mood: annoyed annoyed
music: TLC - Case Of The Fake People

So roughly, the last two months have flown by as yet another stressful, surreal blur. A lot of time was spent working, more of it was spent worrying needlessly about things, but I walked away from it in seemingly one piece. From about the end of June to the middle of July, agency work was consistent and plentiful, but when I began training at UMC, it pretty much tapered off. I spent a lot of the time working at a drug and alcohol rehabilitation facility that ironically enough housed a great deal of my former clients from Compass, so I was basically paid to hang out with "friends" more or less, because I feel that I've always had an excellent rapport with any and all of my clients/patients anywhere that I've worked.

The PCT training was, and for the most part still is a huge stressor in my life right now. The actual class part of the orientation where the lectures happened was informative, the OJT more of an education than anything, but the real headache has been the (in my opinion) ridiculous ammount of stringency to protocol and no where to negotiate anything. Mind you, I don't want to smash to smithereens a well oiled machine for all intents and purposes, but here me out. I took 2 days of vacation at the beginning of August to go out to Mississippi to see family and be a part of the wedding party for my Aunt's 35th wedding anniversary (something that the powers that be were well informed of before I signed any pre-employment paperwork) and yet they somehow managed to count those 2 days against me as unexcused absences. Also count in that I have suddenly been very sick recently, so much so that I've been having seizures now and have had to leave 1 1/2 days out of class due to these. So at the beginning of the month, my clinical leader gave me a stern talking to and threatened to fire me because I missed 3 1/2 out of my allowed 3 days during this probationary period. So after having a brief bit of insight, I decided that I'd stick it out there, at least until I get my phlebotomy certification in 2 1/2 weeks and then look for opportunities elsewhere.

Aside from that whole thing, I feel really cheated by entering this program to begin with. I mean, I told the powers that be from day one that I wanted to work a medical unit due to the fact that I will be pursuing nursing school and will begin working on my pre-requisites in either October or Jnauary (Gods willing), but due to my previous psych experience, they placed me in the bastard step-child unit of the hospital that is for all intents and purposes it's own little self-contained universe where many of the "rules" and "protocol" of the hospital proper seem to not apply. I was told in my initial interview that I'd be floated to Med/Surg and to the Emergency Department, and until I pitched a fit about it 2 weeks ago, they managed to get me a brief orientation to one of the Med/Surg units. I feel lied to; they told me whatever they could, made promises and everything to get me to take the position that nobody seems to want because the unit can't keep PCT's to save their life.

I think that part of it has to do with the sheer nature of the unit itself (though, compared to other places I've worked, it's a cake job. The only real "challenge" is not dying of boredom after pretty much sitting on your ass for 12 hours) and the fact that the unit manager has a Napoleon complex. But the whole thing got me thinking about how some people can and will be some of the most two-faced, lying, conniving bastards that you will ever meet. Gods know I've had my share of people like that in my life, most specifically within the last 3 years (certain individuals stick out more than others) and you'd think that dealing with those assholes people would've given me some sort of spider sense or other means of clairvoyance as it were to when I'm potentially going to get screwed over, but alas it's to no avail. People will lie, cheat, backstab and screw you even when they have the most sincere look otherwise as they stare you dead in the face. The perpetual wolves in sheep's clothing. Fuck em all I say, they'll get theirs soon enough, even if it's in small doses.

I'm trying to make a more concerted effort to just be not necessarily kind to people, but to just have this sort of civil ambivalence for lack of a better term. It's not to say that I just don't care anymore, because in a way it is, but I don't think that I'm going to put forth the effort to be Mary Fucking Sunshine anymore because it's too exhausting frankly. I have enough shit going on in my head and my life right now to suddenly sweep it all under the rug and try to maintain appearances. I figure if people can't handle that, it's their loss. Sure, it may sting, but I'm not going to go out of my way to be the biggest cunt in the world in sheer retaliation. Not giving a fuck works just as well for me.

Oh well, c'est la vie. I meant to talk about the trip to Mississippi and whatnot, but it seems that in my ranting, time has escaped me and I'm really tired.

Random Meme

Aug. 9th, 2008 | 05:56 pm
location: Home
mood: bored bored
music: Alexz Johnson - Stupid Girl (Remix)

Syphoned from raine_insane

1. My username is _____ because ____.
My username is rbcolorkid as a reference to Rainbow Brite and the Color Kids.

2. My journal is titled ____ because ____.
My journal is titled Shooting Star as a reference to the song Shooting Star from the show Instant Star.

3. My subtitle is ____ because ____.
My subtitle is Unpredictable, Yet Beautiful, again as an homage to Instant Star. Specifically to the character Patsy Sewer, who in the show sang Shooting Star, and was a bit impulsive and unpredictable, and that's something that I could idenify with.

4. My friends page is called ____ because ____.
My friends page is called Shooting Star, because of the above reasons.

5. My default userpic is ____ because ____.
My default userpic is Rainbow Brite and the Color Kids because of my lj username.